Hello, readers. I’m a father of two in a working family (both parent work). I just changed my job, with an $800/mo raise. Theoretically, this should translate into the good life, right?
Well, the stresses of life over the past two years has caused my family to lose control over many aspects of our finances. I’ve decided to try to turn it around, and to share our experiences, to help others and of course to maybe learn from the advice of my sage readers!
THE BIG UGLY
Here’s what I call the “big ugly”: we’re $28,000 in debt, due to poor management of credit cards. We never used to buy anything on credit, but over the last couple of years, I had some travel that did not get re-imbursed, we ended up paying taxes two years in row on credit, and then some bad habits started. It’s understandable how the stresses of life can get away – I had to focus on creating a new job for myself where I work; we weren’t sure if we were going to stay where we live, perhaps we were even going to have to sell the house and relocate. I was successful at creating my new position (thank goodness), and now we have the situation.
Getting Behind on Paying Ahead
Some “Little Uglies”: Last year, we had to buy a heater, and planned to pay ahead. We did, for a while. Then we had another card – my ‘travel’ card – about $1700, that’s all – also, we planned to pay ahead. I took out a card to buy books online with a popular online book vendor – the lure of savings, free shipping, how wise was I! Then my wife started buying everyday items at a national brand store on that store’s card – the idea is that points go to the local school – and you earn points to save up for a 10% off shopping day – but she starting buying more than she paid ahead. Truth is, she always paid the bills, but never really liked to pay ahead, unless there was a single large item – like a heater, or a computer. We also have two cars and the mortgage.
Why The Mortgage Matters Most to Me
In October 2005, I came down with a lung condition and they found spots on a scan. Scary stuff. I was 37 at the time; mom died from breast cancer when I was quite young, and cancer is prevalent in our family. I couldn’t breathe, and was laid out on the couch for three months. I couldn’t walk up a flight of stairs. Two years later I finally received a diagnosis of allergy-induced asthma. Thank goodness!
When I felt better (mid-December 2005), I felt like I had a new lease on life. First priority: pay off the mortgage and secure the home at least for my family. Second priority- find a creative outlet. I found songwriting; that’s a different story altogether. My new hobby did add to our expenses; I bought two new guitars within one year; strings cost money; a sound system for our performances, but, all in all, it helped me keep my head on straight – and I found a social network to keep my spirits buoyed during the dark times.
Slowly, one by one, we were late on each card. Finance charges compounded; interest rates went up; the pack of wolves were circling. I was oblivious to most of this, as I didn’t pay the bills. Things starting getting hectic at my wife’s job, I was launching a new career and writing a book. What time we had as a family was spent making experiences with and for the boys. All the while, we were sinking deeper and deeper into debt.
Tomorrow: The Beginning of the Turn-Around – A System for Personal Finances
